Wednesday, May 13, 2009

WANTED: MOLESTA THE MAGNIFICENT


I am sorry to announce that the Amazing Dollar Stock Circus packed up and left town unexpectedly this morning, disappointing both kids and adults alike.

I should have fired
Booze-O and Molesta the Magnificent 3 days ago.

The good news is, I already caught
Booze-O (pictured below, right), red-handed, running out with my money this morning. However, Molesta (pictured below, left) escaped, and is wanted for grand larceny:


Molesta is considered to be armed and dangerous, not to mention, a pure shitbag.

The iBC Police Department is offering a reward of $100,000 for information leading directly to the arrest of Molesta. If you have any information concerning this fucking clown, please contact your local iBCPD field office immediately.

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In other news, I took a -5% hit today. Not bad considering I had 17 long positions. I removed 7 of them in the morning, raised 60% cash, and gained 2% from scalping FAZ. MRGE, DVAX and ICAD held up well. I am expecting some sort of reactionary rally in response to the current -5% decline in the SPX in which case I will systematically remove more positions. I will also add shorts on said reactionary rally (if it is one). 2009 YTD gains now stand at +142%.

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